Best Funny WhatsApp Status Quotes For 2015

Listed Below Are The Best Funny Whatsapp Status Quotes for 2015

 

  • Some people are too chipper early in the morning, and what they don’t realize is that it’s very bad for their good health…until I am choking them.
  • This lame status is not the only one that you’ll be reading this year….so brace yourself for the long haul.
  • Hunting is so easy for a vegan because sneaking up on a plant doesn’t take rocket science…
  • I get my best workouts done when I’m hiding from boring colleagues at my workplace.
  • There are many things that you can say about women, but it takes real talent to turn a compliment into a two hour argument…
  • My boss was feeling down and so I decided to cheer him up with a joke … so I showed him my pay slip…
  • Honest people can be put into two categories….little kids and drunk persons.
  • It’s a good thing that Apple is not in charge of New Year because we would all be waiting for 2015 but instead get 2014S.
  • I’m engaged….to become drunk and disorderly while ushering in the new year…
  • After thinking about my new year’s resolution, I settled for 1024X768.
  • Why was the bull sweating? Because he was in a tight jersey!
  • Before ALL CAPS, how did people express their anger?
  • Like this status if you are “never drinking alcohol”.
  • “I’m not looking forward to the New Year Celebrations….what with all the drinking and merry making” -my liver.
  • Being awesome for yet another year is my New Year resolution.
  • My hobbies include trying to close the elevator door before someone else get on.
  • If you catch a homeless couple having sex, is it rude to tell them to “get a room”?
  • I’ll forever be indebted to you if you lend me a million bucks.
  • My love for you is like a lit candle…if you ever forget me….I’m burning your house down.
  • My girlfriend said that I’m too fickle…while wearing her fake hair, fake nails and speaking with her fake accent.

Funny-Whatsapp-Status-Quotes-2015

Best Funny Whatsapp Status Quote of 2015

 

  • Whining on Facebook should be declared illegal.
  • I took my wife to Honolulu on honeymoon 5 years back… its my marriage anniversary next week and I am going to bring her back now.
  • It’s not that I hate anyone; it’s just that I do not like people.
  • Let us all put down our cell phones and talk to each other….someone whose phone battery is dead.
  • It is better not to post a status update and let people think that you’re dumb, than to post one and remove all doubt.
  • It’s funny how couples have a fight and then immediately change their relationship status to “single”. Hey listen, I fight with my parents but you never see me change my status to “orphan”.
  • Dear Autocorrect, she’s an amazing woman not an amazon woman, thanks. Now I’m never going to get laid.
  • I was going to make you a rum cake but somehow I made you a plain cake and now I’m drunk.
  • This pregnancy test confirmed my worst fear….I’m just fat.
  • I read somewhere that drinking too much is not good for your health….so I stopped reading.
  • Think we could get the North Korean Hackers to end “Keeping Up With The Kardashians”?
  • Christmas is just like a day at the office….you do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
  • It’s a shame that stupidity can’t be converted into a useable source of energy.
  • People who say watching golf on TV is boring have obviously never listened to golf on the radio.
  • If you didn’t want me stopping by for cake, you shouldn’t have advertised your birthday with balloons & banner on your mailbox.
  • Have a prosperous new year….I may need to borrow some money.
  • Why is it always “I see you drank all the beer today!” instead of, “Oh, honey, that was so sweet of you to help clean out the refrigerator.”
  • I wouldn’t hire a personal trainer, but I would gladly pay someone to knock unhealthy foods out of my hands.
  • If I go missing this holiday season and there’s a big search party out looking for me, you can save time by not looking at the gym.
  • Turns out that At Home DNA Test is not a good baby shower gift.
  • A wife is like a hand grenade because if you remove the ring, your home is gone.
  • Love your neighbor, but make sure you don’t get caught.
  • If I had a dollar for every funny status I read, I’d be rich.
  • The downside to posting jokes all the time is that if I posted “Help, I am in an Iranian prison” everyone would be like “ha ha good one”

 

Leave a Comment